First Cousins

[snooze]

Is marriage between first cousins still legal in the UK? London, in particular? For some reason I think it isn't, but then I see Victoria and Albert and start humming and hawing all over again. I'm having trouble finding out whether this is taboo or not.

[AXJ]

You can indeed marry your cousin in the UK:
http://www.weddingguide.co.uk/articles/legal/prohibited.asp

This is one of those taboos that annoys me, as it's not really based on fact. The increase in risk of birth defects between random non-related couples and first cousins is only about 2% greater, and you can minimize or eliminate that risk by understanding your family history of genetic diseases.

Which is to say, if both you and your mate have a family history of hemophilia, it may not be a good idea to have children with them regardless of whether or not you're cousins. If you've both got a clean slate, you're almost certainly safe.

[Einna]

The way I see it, it's more about how you were bought up. It's similar to step-siblings...if they were raised together to be like siblings, then yes, I think they need therapy. If they rarely/never see each other, and aren't close as family until they're older, then I don't see anything wrong with it. The genetic risks are not high enough to justify the taboo surrounding it, and yes, it is legan here in the UK.

[AXJ]

It's similar to step-siblings...if they were raised together to be like siblings, then yes, I think they need therapy. If they rarely/never see each other, and aren't close as family until they're older, then I don't see anything wrong with it.

http://w0rdie.com/upload/files/2/Smileys/ehh.gif I'm confused- why it is only wrong if you grew up around each other, but not wrong if you didn't?

[Tundra]

^ If you grow up together really close, then it would feel a bit too... close.

[AXJ]

^ If you grow up together really close, then it would feel a bit too... close.

Hm, interesting.

Suppose you were always friends with a boy from your neighborhood where you grew up- you guys always played together as little kids. And then around when your turned 18, you realized you loved each other. Would that also be too close?

[Tundra]

... No. But you're not brought up to think of your neighbour friend as 'family'.
I don't have any cousins other than 5 year old and one year old girls, so I can't really tell.

[AXJ]

... No. But you're not brought up to think of your neighbour friend as 'family'.

:fullcircle:

But again, if there's no significant genetic risk, what does it matter if you think of them as family or not? The way I see it, it's either 'safe' or 'not safe'.

[vindemiatrix]

I would personally not give a damn about creepy incestual feelings between a couple as long as it's all consensual and they're not likely to turn out some deformed kids. That's their business.

All of my cousins are too repulsive to marry, anyway.

[snooze]

I'm looking for a taboo kind of love for a story-line subplot. So if first cousins isn't close enough, I guess half-siblings couldup the ante, so to speak? In terms of being socially unacceptable, I mean.

[Tundra]

... No. But you're not brought up to think of your neighbour friend as 'family'.

:fullcircle:

But again, if there's no significant genetic risk, what does it matter if you think of them as family or not? The way I see it, it's either 'safe' or 'not safe'.

the way i see it, it's either 'ew' or 'not ew'. and yes, i know that's just a taboo, but it's pretty hard to break.

[vindemiatrix]

I'm looking for a taboo kind of love for a story-line subplot. So if first cousins isn't close enough, I guess half-siblings couldup the ante, so to speak? In terms of being socially unacceptable, I mean.

Go the whole VC Andrews route and just make them full sibs! *grin*

Half-sibs would be fine, but there's possibility for genetic weirdness re: babies. Other than that it seems sound to me. Socially unacceptable, but still a little off the full squick factor of actual siblings; especially if they weren't raised together. I'm guessing they're m/f?

[AXJ]

the way i see it, it's either 'ew' or 'not ew'.

http://w0rdie.com/upload/files/2/Smileys/laugh.gif http://w0rdie.com/upload/files/2/Smileys/laugh.gif

(I'm probably going to be chuckling over that line for a while.)

[LadyAbby]

I dunno. Even half sibs seem squick to me, but that's probably because my 'half' brother never felt like a half brother, he always always was a full brother to me. I could see step sibs, especially if they're the same age. Or if you want the squick factor, then I say go with the half sibs.

[AXJ]

Yeah, half sibs is definately trouble. And illegal in pretty much all of western civilization.

[theNightingale]

I think first cousins works. (And hey, you can't help who you love, right?)

[snooze]

Yeah--I need the genetic mutation possibility factor, as well as the social impropriety of the situation. I have no half-siblings, so I can deal with that one, just like I haven't seen any of my cousins for ages so I'm rather detatched from that. But the full-sibling thing is still too weird for me to tackle.
I need two relatives who are comparatively close, but not exactly raised side-by-side. Like really good friends, only related. Maybe have on half-sibling be way older than the other...except that starts toying with paedophilia, and I think there's rules involving that regarding adopted or step-siblings that they can never have lived in the same house at any time when one of them was a minor.
I think half siblings mostly raised apart can suit my purposes.

[vindemiatrix]

To be slightly squicky and use myself as a possible source of inspiration:

My half-brother is seven years older than me. I saw him a lot when we were younger, as one of the terms of his mum's divorce from my dad was that he came to stay every second weekend. However, when he hit eighteen the divorce terms didn't apply any more and I didn't see him for about three years. I've just started seeing him every so often again. When we were younger, though, we were absolutely inseparable when he came over. Would that be the sort of thing you were thinking of?

I feel just a little dirty now. *wants to wash*

[girlunquestioned]

^ If you grow up together really close, then it would feel a bit too... close.

Hm, interesting.

Suppose you were always friends with a boy from your neighborhood where you grew up- you guys always played together as little kids. And then around when your turned 18, you realized you loved each other. Would that also be too close?


That's kind of what my newest story is like!

They grew up next door neighbours, but their parents were best friends and they were essentially raised as siblings and best friends, but then she moved away, and now she's back, and there's a huge rift and ...

I've been toying with the idea of planting the seeds of romance between them.

That kind of unspoken, illogical taboo would be important to it. They're also black hispanic and white, and asdlkf it's just COMPLICATED.



First cousins would be socially unacceptable, but really, if you think about it, there's no problem, as people said before.

But think of the FAMILIAL reactions ... They would freak! They might fight a lot, or even disown the couple!

[AXJ]

But think of the FAMILIAL reactions ... They would freak! They might fight a lot, or even disown the couple!

Yeah, seriously, especially if the family is old fashioned. If I married one of my cousins it would hit my family like an h-bomb. I don't know if we'd get disowned or not- possibly- but it would definately make things very weird.

[Tundra]

^ your aunt would be your mother in law.